It Just Shouldn't Be

In the last few weeks I have come across some instances of things that just shouldn’t be. And so I decided that it was high time for another installment of Things You Should Never Do.

Once more… I am not saying that I had any personal affiliation with any of these occurrences. Perhaps these are things that, as a general rule, shouldn’t be done. You might learn something very valuable and save yourself some awkward moments in the future.

1. You should never wear your new cute, white sweater while eating spaghetti for dinner…. That is an accident waiting to happen. And then, if you happen to splatter yourself a tiny, tiny bit, you certainly should NOT keep the sweater on until you splatter yourself AGAIN in a more obvious place! I mean… why would you ever do that???

2. You should not go to the Cheesecake Factory for dinner when you are trying to get your vacation beach body. That is just a wonderful building full of temptation. The least of which is the cheesecake (there is that in abundance as well) but the bread and the pasta and more bread is the worst (or best, depending on how you look at it). And also, if you are at aforementioned restaurant in the specific instance of trying to stay slim, you should not feel enraged that the waitress only brought you one basket of bread and three clumps of butter, and you really should not ask for another basket of bread (with extra butter!) even though she brought your heap of pasta already.

3. You should never have your bread maker sitting on the counter when you start it after having an experience a few weeks prior with the kneading cycle spinning the bread maker off the counter and onto the floor. If it happened once…. It will happen again. I am just saying. But…. Hypothetically speaking, if that were me… I would still pick that pile of dough up, stick it back in the bread maker, and eat it.

4. You should not have the following sequence of events occur:

a. Lecture your husband about buying a HUGE box of haggen-dazs bars because you don’t want the temptation

b.      Eat some with him the next night

c.       Come home the subsequent night and discover he ate one without you

d.      Lecture him about eating one without you

e.      Eat the LAST bar by yourself without even sharing a morsel with him

5.  And finally… if you have committed to doing squats every day, you should not get into bed prior to doing them just because you want to cuddle a little. It is no fun to get out of your cozy bed and have to do a hundred plus squats in the dark. Or you might be faced with the temptation to skip them altogether. Oh dear…

What are some things you think should never be done?

Closing a Glorious Chapter

Speaking of seasons, simple pleasures, and the end of eras, this week closed a chapter in my life. It is going to come across as something very silly and insignificant, and yet it is one of those little things in life which have brought me joy. 

The season finale of Psych. Now, the last thing in the world I want to do right now, is convince anyone who has not watched this show to do so. It is a very specific sense of humor for a very specific crowd. And that crowd just happens to be my family.

This sad event that occurred this week is the close of a chapter that started when I was still living at home. My parents, little sister and I were introduced to the show by my little brother (at first very unwillingly). And then it became something very special. We spent time laughing together as a family. We bonded over the witty and hilarious Shawn and Gus.

Then I got married. In that first year, Cory and I went through the completed seasons together. We didn’t have any furniture in the room that housed our big box tv, so we laid on the floor almost every night for an episode or two. We laughed and laughed.

Whenever the show was running, us kids who have no children would go over to my parents and watch it together. It became a ritual to sing the theme song at the top of our lungs. My dad even printed out the sheet music and we sang with the guitar sometimes. I mean, this was a big deal in our family.

When Cory and I were in Venice last year, we made it to an internet café and downloaded the current episodes. I know that sounds ridiculous, I mean, we were in Italy! But let me tell you, after a wonderfully long day of sightseeing, there is nothing more enjoyable then snuggling up in your little Venetian apartment with a glass of red wine and your husband to watch a little piece of home. We even watched that particular episode a few times that trip. I don't remember what was so funny, but Cory was laughing so hard he was almost crying. Good times.

And so this Wednesday brought the fatal night. The end of an era and a wonderful simple pleasure in our lives. My parents hosted a Psych party/wake. Everyone brought a pineapple snack (you would have to watch the show to get that). The whole family (minus kids and the two husbands with those kids) showed up to say farewell to our friends of eight years. We sang louder than ever. And I am not going to lie… tears were shed. And I don't just mean one glistening tear on cheeks.

It was a pretty epic party.

This is just another little thing in life that can be so meaningless, and yet how many memories are wrapped up in it? Don’t get me wrong, the world is definitely found far outside the tv, but occasionally those things can be tools used to bond people even closer together.

So here is to those little traditions you create as a family that bring you together. I hope they make you laugh as much as Psych made us laugh.

I wish I could put all the Gus look a like crying pictures.... but I think it would make many members of my family mad. So these will have to suffice: 

What His Looked Like and Mine - a Rant

Well here I go, all fired up for yet another rant. And it is not even going to be a useful one. It is something that most women can relate to, but no one has a solution. But really I have something to say about the differences in men’s and women’s bodies… *Pause as I chuckle to myself…I literally just this second realized how the previous sentence (accompanied with the title) sounds.* Awesome. Happy accident. But before your minds go off into any other place (I cannot imagine where), I am not going to be talking about anything that interesting. Yeah…it’s just about food.

Dinner tonight.

What his looked like:

 

And mine:

 It may look like a subtle difference.... but trust me. It is not. 

Sloppy Joes. Something about that organic ground beef, drenched in a combination of tasty sauces which has been roasting in the crock pot all day, smelling up the house with fumes of deliciousness. And yet… half of the beauty is that you get to pile that heap onto a thick slice of freshly homemade bread…. Well some of us do.

It just isn’t the same with cabbage….

Anyway, I know I do this to myself. Refrain. Abstain. Be disciplined. Be silly. Whatever you want to call it. But the fact of the matter is, Cory can eat half a loaf of bread a day, work out half as much as I do, and STILL maintain his weight. Ugghh. It is so frustrating!

Anyway, sorry to be “that girl.” It is just one of those things we women have to deal with; the incongruent metabolisms that God blessed us with. 

On another note. The Sloppy Joes were delicious. And if you are interested in giving them a whirl, you can find the recipe here. 

P.S... If you do, I say screw it and eat the bread.